


Hunted

by Maeve_Lynn



Category: Ranger's Apprentice - John Flanagan
Genre: "I won't leave you", After Skandia, Father-Son Relationship, Fear, Gen, Hunted by Nightmares, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, RA Fanfic Challenge
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-20
Updated: 2020-01-20
Packaged: 2021-02-27 14:55:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,695
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22338889
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Maeve_Lynn/pseuds/Maeve_Lynn
Summary: Halt and Will returned from Skandia, but after a couple of weeks Halt notices Will isn't doing well. However, his apprentice doesn't want to talk about it. After attending a meeting at the castle, Halt rides back to their cabin, but immediatly senses something's wrong. Inside, he finally gets to know what's going on with Will.
Relationships: Halt O'Carrick & Will Treaty
Comments: 9
Kudos: 72
Collections: RA Fanfiction Challenge #1





	Hunted

**Author's Note:**

> I imagine Halt using Hibernian words from time to time.  
> In the story, there are the words 'mhac' and 'athair', which mean 'son' and 'fahter'.  
> I hope the translation is right, sorry if it's not.

Halt observed the boy in front of him, while Will was training with his bow. The Ranger was concerned: it had been almost two months since they had returned from Skandia, but still his apprentice hadn’t talked about his experiences. It wasn’t a nice or cosy subject to talk about, but Halt knew that if Will kept everything to himself, he would destroy himself from the inside. After nearly an hour of looking and worrying, Halt decided that Will had trained enough. He walked to the young man and picked up the bow. “Halt, can I have it back? I need-“ “The only thing you need to do, is to rest.” He saw the change on Will’s face. Halt knew that he hated it when his teacher demanded that he stopped training for the day, but it was the best thing for now. Will inhaled and, while passing Halt, pressed the arrows in his hands. He opened the front door and slammed it. Halt sighed. There wasn’t anything he could do about the situation.

\-------

_“It’s cold, so cold,” Will thought. He couldn’t find his blanket and that made him panic. It was the only source of warmth, although it was not that much. His hands shook, his thoughts went through each other and his sight became blurry. He needed it, now. He looked around, hoping to find Handel. There he was! “Just a few more seconds and everything would be alright,” he kept telling himself. Handel gave the drug and Will was ready to take it, but a cry from behind him made him stop._

_He turned around to see Evanlyn in the cabin. They had made it out of that terrible place. She was taking care of him, while he wasn’t himself. He counted the hours until he got a portion of the warmweed. “Here Will,” was all the girl said. She couldn’t see him eating it. He almost turned into an animal when he reached to it and put it in his mouth. “I wish Halt was here, he knew what to do,” she whispered. Halt, Will thought. Why does that name sound so familiar?_

_The warmweed was just doing it’s work, when he heard another cry. “Will! I promise I will find you, no matter where they’ll take you!”_ _He knew that voice, but to whom did it belong?_ _He turned around for the second time, only to find a man standing between the trees. He was shocked, stood there as if he was frozen. “Wait, I know him. Isn’t that…?”_

_A hand on his shoulder made him come back to the horrible place. “No! I want to go! Let me go!” Will screamed over and over again. Tears came into his eyes and sweat dripped from his face. No, no, no! He panicked and saw how his friends disappeared into the background. He stretched his hands, hoping to grab their clothes, but the hand on his shoulder pulled him away. Oh, that hand. Of all things, not that hand!_

During the night it happened again. He could hear the breathing of Will becoming louder and also the groaning. He waited a while before checking how Will was doing. At a certain point, Halt went out of bed and walked to the room next to his. “Will?” he asked, while touching his arm. He never touched Will’s shoulder since it gave him bad memories. With a face full of fear, the boy pushed Halt’s arm away. The Ranger wasn’t sure what was going on. A few weeks ago, there was no problem when he laid a hand on his arm. All of sudden, Will didn’t allow it anymore. “Are you alright? Did you have-” Will couldn’t take it anymore. “NO! I’M NOT ALRIGHT!” he screamed. Halt was startled. It was even worse than he had thought: Will was already losing his mind. He tried to talk with Will, but the boy didn’t want to listen. “Isn’t there anything I can do for you?” Halt whispered. He wanted to say what he needed, how his mentor and friend could help him, but all Will could do, was crying and shaking his head.

\-------

A couple of days later Halt had to attend a meeting at the castle. He didn’t want to go, afraid that Will would have another panic attack. However, Will assured him he would be fine. It was only two hours and during the day Will never had had a flashback. “You’re sure you’ll be fine?” Halt asked for at least the seventh time that morning. Will smiled. It was a small smile, almost invisible. “Yes, Halt, I’ll be fine. If something goes wrong, I know what I have to do.” They were standing on the veranda and Abelard was already waiting. _Hurry up or you’ll be late. Again._ He placed his foot in the stirrup and pulled himself into the saddle. Before he went out of sighed, Halt looked back and saw how Will lifted his hand. His mentor turned around and rushed to the meeting.

After Halt was out of sight, Will took his weapons and started to train. They had made the deal that Will would train for two hours and after he would take dome rest, but he stayed with his own plan. He threw his knifes so often, he lost count. His arrows flew over the training yard and hit the target. Everything was going well, until he felt how his hands started to shake. His vision became blurry and his heartbeat accelerated. This couldn’t happen, not now. Will tried to find out what triggered him, but he didn’t know: it could be anything. Will inhaled deep and exhaled. He did this multiple time, until he felt better. It was one of the tips Halt gave him and so far, it helped. When he was sure he could walk properly, he stored his weapons away and the moment he had done that, he was on his way to greet his horse. In the stable, he filled Tug’s food and water and also brushed him. Being with his horse made him feel better. That was also the reason why he snugged out of the house during nights when he didn’t feel well. He didn’t have to tell Tug how he was doing because he already knew. They were one, they felt how the other was doing and therefore, Will wouldn’t need to use words. “Hey old friend, how are you?” Tug looked up and after examining his friend, he tapped with his hoof on the floor. Now the boy wished Halt was there and he could feel how his body began to paralyze. Because what Tug did, was giving the signal that Will would have a panic attack. And this wasn’t a normal one, this was a heavy one. In the distance he heard Tug neighing for help, but no one would come to help them. Will was all alone and a certain thought came in his mind. He had to resist it, but without the help of Halt, he wasn’t sure if he could do it.

Meanwhile, Halt was staring at the window. The meeting was taking much longer than Baron Arald had planned. Forwards, Halt had said that he wanted to go back as soon as possible to his cabin and his friend pledged that it wouldn’t take long. It was a boring meeting about taxes, farmers who refused to pay and robbers who interfered inhabitants close to the border with another fief. In the last case, the two Rangers had to figure out where the robbers came from and they had to plan how to catch them. Luckily for Halt, he only had to give the information to his college, since the thieves had returned to the neighbouring fief. “Halt, are you listening?” Baron Arald looked in his direction and from his face, he could see what Halt was thinking, or actually at whom. “Forgive me, my lord. Lately there are a lot of things I have to think about.” Arald nodded and continued the meeting. After almost three hours of sitting, Halt couldn’t wait to go home. Something told him that Will needed him. “Halt, can I talk to you for a moment?” The other men had already left the room. “I know you want to go home, to Will, but I need to ask you: how is the boy doing? He isn’t himself, I can tell it from his way of walking, the way he speaks. It’s not… Will. Do you understand me?” Halt looked away. Arald had just summed up what was wrong. Will wasn’t himself: he wasn’t hungry, trained way too much, didn’t talk. His apprentice suffered a lot, however, as long as Will didn’t say what he could do to help him, the only thing he could was helpless standing at the side line. The older man placed a hand on Halt’s shoulder. “I feel your pain Halt, everyone does. Lately his friends came to me, hoping to get some information about Will. The worst part of all was the fact that I couldn’t tell them.” They stood there, until his servant told Baron Arald he had to come with him. “I have to go now.” He walked to the door and looked back once more. “We’re thinking of you, Halt. And we’re here if you need us.” Then, he followed his servant.

He knew something was wrong. He could tell it from the way Tug was greeting them. It wasn’t a happy one, as he usual did. This was a warning and his intuition told him it had to do with Will. He brought Abelard back to the stable and while he comforted the horse of the boy, he noticed some red drops on the wooden fence. He dipped his finger in it and was surprised when he felt it was warm. Suddenly a horrible imagine came in his mind. He rushed to the cabin and on the veranda, he found it. One of Will’s knife was laying there, and the point was red coloured. He picked it up, cleaned it with his cloak and opened the door. In a corner, next to the fire place, he saw him. Arms wrapped around his knees and his head on top of it. Halt’s heart almost skipped a few beats when he saw the sleeve of Will’s shirt. Slowly, he approached him, since he didn’t want to scare him. “No, leave me alone,” Will said. “Please Will, let me help you. You’re- you’re wounded. Let me clean it. Please, I beg you.” Will never thought he would hear those words, but he agreed without complaining. Relieved that he could do at least something, Halt packed the first aid box. With the help of a pair of scissors, he cut the sleeve open and gasped when he saw what the source of the bleeding was. “Mo mhac” was all he could say. Will didn’t understand what it meant because it was Hibernian. He felt how tears filled his eyes again as Halt examined his arm. It was full of white lines. Scars that had appeared the last couple of weeks. Suddenly, he knew why Will hadn’t talked about Skandia, why he was so silent. But most of all: why he pushed Halt’s arm away a couple of days before. While cleaning the wound, Halt remained silent. That made Will anxious. He believed Halt was disappointed in him. He thanked the Ranger for his help and stood up. Will could feel his eyes is his back as he walked to his room.

He couldn’t sleep and was thinking a lot. Gently he touched his arm and his finger ran over the scars. He wanted to stop it, but it was so difficult. He had heard how villagers talked about it and became afraid of their reactions when they found out. That was also the reason why he hadn’t told his friends about it. It felt like nobody would understand him. No, that was not true. Tug understood him, and Abelard too. Although is was Halt’s horse, Will became friends with him as well. He had the same humour as his rider, but also the same wisdom. _The best thing you can do, is to tell him. He won’t be mad. Right now, he is only very sad that he can’t help you, although he wishes he could._ Abelard had given that advise that morning, when Halt had asked Will to prepare his horse. He thought about it for a while when he made his decision.

It was almost two o’clock in the morning when Halt heard a soft knock on his door. He was awake, but not fast enough to open the door. He turned around in his bed and saw Will standing next to it. He sat up and raised an eyebrow. “I-I can’t sleep,” was all Will could say. “Something is bothering you, isn’t it? Come on, sit down and tell me.” Halt crossed his legs and Will took place on the edge of the bed. He stared at his feet, unable to talk. Halt waited all the time until, finally, Will had found the right words. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. I wanted to, but I- I thought you’d be mad or disappointed at me. Besides, I was ashamed, because I thought no Ranger would do… you know.” Halt already thought it was that, but it was important that Will told it himself. “Will, look at me.” Normally, Halt’s voice was full of authority. This time, it was full of compassion. The boy did as he was asked and saw a smile on his face. It was a sad smile, but when he saw it, he knew that Halt wasn’t angry. His words confirmed his thought. “I’ll never be mad at you, nor disappointed, you hear me? I was only sad and scared. I know it’s not easy to talk about it, but you have to. You can choose what you want to tell me, but please, say at least something. Only then I’ll be able to help you.” Will nodded. “Can we talk tomorrow?” “Of course we can. Any time you want to talk, let me know.” They sat on the bed in silence, until Will had found the courage to ask one last thing. “Halt, have you ever-” To his surprise, he saw how Halt took off his night shirt and came closer. On his left upper arm, Will saw three lines, the same as he had. He couldn’t believe his eyes. “I’m also a human being and yes, I had those thought too. Not long, but I had them. These two,” he pointed at the ones on top, “I made after I told my parents that my brother tried to kill me. They didn’t believe me and that upset me a lot.” He could see the question in Will’s eyes. “Another time Will, I will tell you that story.” Will smiled and then looked at that the last one. “What about this one?” The third one was deeper than the others and seemed quite new. “That was when I lost you,” Halt said. “Crowley had denied my request and I was so desperate, that I lost control. I hurt myself, hoping to forget the grief of losing you to the Skandians.” Will didn’t know what to say. In his opinion, Halt was invincible. He sat there while Halt put his shirt on again. “Halt? May I stay here for the night?” “Sure you can, mhac.” Halt laid on his back and Will found a comfortable position on his left side. There was one thing he wanted to know. “What does ‘mhac’ mean? Is it Hibernian?” “All those questions,” Halt joked. “It’s indeed Hibernian and means ‘son’.” Flattered that Halt called him son, he closed his eyes and yawned. Halt went through the brown hair with his hand and Will smiled. “If you ever need something, let me know and I’ll get it for you.” Halt said before he also closed his eyes. Before they fell asleep, Will said, “The only thing I need is you, athair.”


End file.
